How to not get jealous of your friends success
So went to tier 1/1.5 , EE branch , during placement I never really found interest in DSA. Thought I’ll do a simple job but now when I see my peers getting into big product companies , with great pay I feel so sad. I feel like I should have prepared better. And then after coming to Bangalore it feels even more sad because whenever I go on dates the other guy is always an IIT guy earning more than me 😅. Even among my friends I kinda envy them that they have chill wlb plus better pay . Is this how life is?
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Your situation isn't too dire. You can always prepare now, upskill and switch to better openings. With more experience, your compensations will standardise with the median.
But you should also address the underlying feelings behind this jealousy. There are always going to be a ton of folks ahead of you so this feeling probably won't go away unless you make it.
Hey thanks for answering. So currently I am working as an analyst profile and to be honest I kinda started DSA a few months back. But i stopped doing it because I thought i should focus on something else like making my current skills better . Truth is I am kinda lost. I don’t know where my life is headed and it is scary. I fear that I will get left behind my peers.
I am in similar situation. Currently a data analyst from tier 3. Don't know what to prepare for and switch. Hopefully will switch in some pure analytics firm.
"Whenever I go on dates the other guy is always an IIT guy earning more than me"
Hahaha! Women usually date up. So if you are ending up dating all IITians (who do superbly average otherwise in the dating market) it is not by accident but by subconscious or conscious mate choice making.
This is not really the sad you are making it out to be. Good luck with your marriage tho.
Dude I don't care if you get this wrong - fuck this shit. Go to the gym, make a good physique. Join some biker gang. Stop randi rona and comparing with others.
Yeah I should start again but my work timings are so bad that I don’t get time 😭
Find some time and start slow. Once it becomes a habit it's easy. Believe in yourself. 🙂
Started with one of the lowest packages in the batch of 180. Now after 5 years earning is comparable to the one who got the highest package. Even those who get placed in good companies are now asking for interview advice because they haven't prepared anything for all those years.
Any tips sir 🙌?
yep. thats how life is. everyone is always looking up. if you ask them and they are being honest most of your friends and dates will tell you that behind the chill and glitz they are deeply regretful for not being where they could have been. only people will honestly reply in contrary will be those who actually love what they do and not the green that comes with it.
the beauty of computer science is that its largely domain agnostic and universally applicable. find a domain you love , pull the preparation plug one step at a time. be relentless and patient in concurrance. more often than not things will fall in place.
Picturing your future Self
Ask yourself what you would need to do to infuse your present life with the qualities you have identified.
Complete the following sentence with all the people on your list:
From [person X] I envy, I could realistically learn…
Resist the impulse to denigrate those you envy. Settle into the position of a student of your own envy.
Perspective
It feels like you are deeply equal to the people you envy. But in what way are you not in fact their equal? What genuine qualities do they have which you lack?
Fill in the following sentence:
It feels like I am equal to X because… (I am the same age/gender/nationality…)
But I am not equal to X because…
Questions/tasks
– Every life is incomplete: what do you think the people you envy might envy?
– What do you think are the statistical chances of accomplishing what the person you envy has accomplished? How common is this?
– Imagine turning envy into admiration.
– In what way is it reasonable enough that you might not have got this thing, given how things are…
– Imagine someone who likes you describing how you are OK, even quite admirable, without the thing they envy
– Name as many things as you can that you craved in the past and then acquired, but which failed to improve your life as much as you had anticipated.
Typically, envious feelings swirl around unexamined. We carry them about guiltily but blindly. This gives rise to outbursts of bad temper directed at innocent bystanders (especially one’s partner); the sneaking hope that something bad is going to befall the person we envy and a sullen sense that one’s life is second-rate.
This is the best thing that I have read in the entire day
Maybe just talk with the friends which you envy, instead of seeing them at a pedestal If you keep getting jealous of friends you'll burn internally.
Some of your friends might as well do xyz crores income but that doesn't take from your plate, get inspired, learn.
Another take if you're "hero/heroine types look" might as well find a crorepati sugar daddy/momy, then you'll be the envy of "working class" folks, 🤣🤣
remember there was post here of "unskilled women getting married rich enjoying life"