Toxic Relationship
I don't know where to start, but just here to get perspective and what's right or wrong. I have been in a relationship with my partner for 8 years now, but been a year since we are living together. Last year has been so tough for me, He has been verbally and physically abusive to me, when I say something out of overthinking or insecurity. He never accepts or realises his mistakes instead says I have done a similar thing or that I was the reason he did that or because I did something that's why he did that. Not a single time he said sorry for being physically abusive. Being a girl , with obviously lesser strength than a man, I can only scratch him, and thats what I did with him when he starts to beat me for saying him something. Earlier before living together, he would in public too twist my hands and hurt me if I said something he did that hurt me but might be not in his intention. Now after a big abusive fight, I recently discovered he has been exchanging posts with another school friend of his , the way you would do in dating phase. No conversations as such ( because he deleted previous chats) . But he said he has been doing that since we fought. I confronted him over this, he says IF I promise to not leave then he will block her,( he has not done so ), but he has not done it yet , he is still talking to her right infront of me. He has never hid his phone from me, but from past few months he was doing that stating that I would be pissed seeing his explore section on instagram( Which always shows nudes of girls ). I dont know how to cope up with this. One moment, I think anyway I was goin to leave him after he abused me, but why his cheating on me is hurting me. Then another moment, I feel like I want to work this out. I dont understand what is right , what to do, I am crying all day, While he just chills with his friends and chats with that girl all day without a hint of how I would be feeling. I invested my 8 years and this is what I get. Who is at fault, I know I might have been overthinking and saying things , so would every guy do this? #depression #mentalhealth #cheating
It's simple logic. A relationship should make your life better and happier. If it's making it worse you should cut that relationship. I assure you that you are not overthinking. Physical abuse should not be tolerated.
I don’t understand what has been going wrong with people all around these days. This is 2nd or 3rd similar post from woman I am reading in last few months.
Are you so weak that you need a man to rely on like a small kid? Why are you living with this guy for a year? First physical aggression and you should have packed your bags and run away. And where did you go wrong for 7 whole years that you could never recognise the person for what he is? And now when you recognise, you just don’t know what to do!!
There must be lakhs of people who have never ever been in any such romantic relationships, and then there are a few like you who think you will die like a crumbled broken leaf if you end the relationship!? Do you even have any life outside of this relationship or not? Do you not have any independent life of your own? People give divorce too and move on, and here you are stuck in a silly stupid relationship, as if a helpless child is stuck with an abusive parents who she is dependent on! JUST MOVE ON. I don’t even see the point of such posts. These should be made after ending the relationships.
Feel her post. She loves him that's why she is hesitating to leave him.
If relationship is not making you happy, move on..
There are many guys on earth, with whom you can stay happy.
Remember one thing, the person who is physically abusive to you before marriage.. he will be worse after marriage.
This is something which you should not take lightly..
How can you not take stand for yourself on this.. how can you compromise with your self respect.. this person is never going to make you happy I bet.
You should have left him when he physically abused you for the first time.. in my opinion. You definitely need some counselling if you are still not able to end this relationship.
Bruh leave. Physical abuse should be the final nail in coffin
Is it physical abuse if I pushed him first and scratched him first..does that mean I am at fault
Words are very harmful so treat them as physical altercations only. But havent you been together for 8 years. By now you should know when to rise what topic and where.
There are so many things to say, but just one thing encapsulates the jist: you can't fix it, you need to leave
Sorry for what you're going through, but do women really tolerate all this for a relationship?
Even after doing everything right, our relationship didn't workout for long and here people be taking abuses and beatings to be in a relationship.
I still remember how I used to play PUBG excessively, which eventually led to her leaving me five years ago. However, I never abused her. Throughout my life, I have never raised a hand against a woman. I’ve been in multiple relationships but have never touched anyone without their consent.
Leave it and get out to safety. No relationship is worth anything if it involves any kind of abuse and that includes mental abuse as well.
Your heart knows this is wrong. It's the right thing to end the relationship . And right choices are not always easy. Have faith in yourself. Love yourself. You don't deserve this.
Leave asap
