There are managers who are paid close to a Crore Rupees a year for doing this.
Scene: Our team is working on it. We’ll get back to you. Reality: I have no idea about what the issue is. I’m completely dependent on my team.
Scene: I have a hard stop now. Have to drop off. Reality: I don’t care about the ongoing meeting. My “passive” attendance in some other meeting is more important than the ongoing meeting.
Scene: +team FYI Reality: Not my responsibility. Team must take a look.
Scene: Do you have some bandwidth? Reality: If you say no, I will use this against you during appraisal.
Scene: Feel free to give feedback about leadership. Your opinion is important for continuous improvement. Reality: Negative feedback should be worded with politically correct statements. Else be ready to face consequences.
Scene: The leadership team expects so-and-so from you. Reality: I’m not capable of questioning the leadership team. I’m just passing the buck to you.
Scene: Can you prepare a deck by this day? Reality: I want to show a rosy picture to my leaders. I will ‘use’ you to impress my leaders.
Scene: Who wants to work on this item? Reality: I’ll judge employees who don’t volunteer.
Scene: I want you to complete this (bullshit work) by this weekend at any cost. Reality: I want to save my ass in this job.
Scene: Do you have any blockers? Reality: As if I’m capable of resolving them…lol
Scene: Taking a day off. Reachable on mobile. Reality: Added the second statement to ‘show’ how important & flexible I am. I know you’ll not call me anyways.
Scene: Manager presenting something. Do you have any questions? Reality: -silence-
Have you ever encountered Managers like these?
99/100. Also the best - switch and bait. What was good yesterday is shit today. I told you so, and Maine kab Kahan ye. Acha Maine bola - you can't use your own head? What about you? Challenge me! You're not taking feedback well. L***f@kir sab ke sab. Top management ke katputle dalle.
Why the fuck they get 1 Crore rupees a year for this? How unfair!
Playing devil’s advocate here. As one grows up the ladder, you become responsible for the results and careers of people reporting to you, and managing stakeholders, customer and senior management. The best managers do this really well. The ones who are average behave like this. They delegate more than needed, have average EQ and hence bad conflict management.
I’m not against the idea of leadership or a managerial role. Unfortunately many managers think this is what their job functions are. That’s the problem I’m trying to callout.
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The models:
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