Wanting to actually screaming, shout and cry but forced to silently cry in pillow. As a society we have put mothers on a pedestal to always respect them, saying they are always right, always loves you, support you and they put your needs before them and all things you read on Mother's day. I can however not relate at all. My mother is a narcissist. I do love her but no, I don't like her. I've been in therapy and I've realized how every single insecurity or my need for validation or the decisions I've taken is all because her. She has always taken me for granted, always demeaned me, she always wants to be the center of attention, always takes all credit. I see my father also being depressed and slowly has given up all together. I feel like a couple counsellor at times. To keep resolving their fights, hear their side, trying to convince them.
She always critisis how I look, what I wear is the most haunting ways and have killed all my confidence. She orders everything to us like she has hired us, her needs take precedence over us. I understand she means well but I'm not an extension of her. I'm a different human. I mean on my birthday she says she should be celebrated because she gave me birth. During fights she abuses and say such horrific things that I have not even heard in streets, and I live in Delhi. She always plays the victim and say things like I kept you in me for 9 months, or tumko padhaya likhaya, I make food for you... But isn't that what as parents you are supposed to do. You signed up for it when you decided to be parents. And I can cook for myself and for them but she don't want to eat what I cook cuz obviously it's not as good as hers. I really want to cut ties but being single child how can you leave your parents. It's more like a rant now with no such structure. And people who don't agree or think I'm ungrateful or exaggerating I beg you to keep your assumptions with you. Because last thing I need is another criticism from someone who don't know things at all. This is just me venting and it's okay if you don't agree, I don't need to know that
Give space to your relationship.. If possible, Stay alone in a different city for sometime (few months at least).
A break is definitely required.
Watch the show called veep. It won't help bit it will make you laugh
Wishing mental peace friend 🙌
This may sound very basic, but start seeing your parents as humans. Humans are selfish arrogant, have good and bad days. Can (and should) prioritise themselves at times.
Parents are put on a pedestal by this society. Yes they 'assume' higher authority because of it. And it also adds a lot of unwanted expectations.
You are mature now. You can see the bigger picture.
You will also see you aren't 100% right everytime, again you are human too - allow yourself to be not perfect
@CantChooseName not only limited to a particular gender, boys also do suffer the same, sometimes with both father and mother.
Have boundaries and be very strict about them. It's very difficult and you will be blamed. But that's the way.
+1
Best of Luck.
If you are financially independent, move out.
If you arent financially independent, then try to be.
Some people are very toxic and they can have children. Doesn't make their children owe them anything.
I am 33M, started working at 20. Earned 87LPA when I was dropped off in June 23. I am a very responsible person who had taken care of everything in the family for quite some time. My parents and relatives and everyone else who know me we...
MOM said this line to me, today again.
There have been countless times, when I have heard this from throughout my childhood. And then, people ask me why you don't love your mom.
I don't feel bad anymore as I have accepted this senten...
Seeing parents getting old and inactive 🥲
1.Realising that you'll have to go for an arrange marriage 2. parents getting older, their deteriorating health 3...
Losing friends. We thought we'll always be together, and then college happened and then work.
Today, I had a realization about workplace communication that I wanted to share.
During a meeting, I found myself in a familiar situation - my manager wasn't listening to my input and was criticizing my work unfairly. Frustrated, I rais...