Being Introverted at Work
It’s been a couple of months since I joined this new startup, and honestly, I’ve been feeling a bit lost.
New environment, new people… I’m trying to adjust, but it’s not coming naturally. Everyone seems to be chatting, having fun, and blending in so easily. I want to be part of that too, but I’m just not that person right away. I take time to open up. In my previous company, it took me almost 3 years to build a really close bond with just two people.
I know work is supposed to be about work, but still… I can’t ignore this feeling of being left out. Most days, I just do what I have to and go back home, and it’s starting to get to me a little.
On top of that, it’s been 2 months and I still haven’t been assigned to any project. My manager keeps asking me to upskill, take trainings, learn this and that… and I am trying. But I feel drained. I’m learning things, but nothing is really sticking because I’m not actually using any of it.
It’s honestly affecting me mentally more than I expected. I really need some advice on two things: 1. How do I improve my communication with peers? And does it actually matter if I just come to office, do my work, and leave? 2. How do I get hands-on experience if I’m not being given any real project work?
Connect with other introverts:)
If both are introverts, how would they connect?👀👀
Sorry I can't relate this with my experience. Konsa startup hai bhai ye jo training material provide karta hai and upskill karwata hai? Why did they hired an experienced candidat at first? I worked in 2 startups and was expected to deliver result on day 0.
Again one more post generate using AI ?
Yeah dude, same here. Even i rarely can form a bond with anyone, maybe a bond based on respect, rapport, dependency at work. Rest all fun/enjoy/talks doesn't work for me it gets way too awkward and it just goes blank. It is definitely a boon to have it, but if not just make do with whatever you have.
It's nice to just involve a little with people. Not necessarily you have to be a friend. But try to just be around them and be part of conversation. It's fine you get to know and understand humans better.
Fake it
Tell yourself everybody already like you
Don't fear sounding stupid
Listen>>talk
Laugh along
So it was you who gave the same advise to Modi for socialising with other world leaders.
You don't have to talk to get along with people. Don't try to push yourself it will just make it harder. You should focus on your work that's the primary objective of being in office, but it's nice to socialize. Just be around your peers join them if they go for a tea break or lunch.. and listen to them and nod. You don't really have to talk, eventually you will ease out around them and interact more.
If its only peers, just go and talk organically. Dont overthink that they will judge. If it still feels so remember "kyuki saas bhi kabhi bahu thi" 😌 Simple..Chill
Dont force yourself to blend in. Go to office, learn and wait. If possible take initiative and help your manager with some simple tasks. Once you get assigned to project, you may form few bonds.
You need to start talking more and learn the art of small talk
Don't force yourself, once you are assigned to a project you will be more vocal with others and nothing wrong in going to the office just for work. I am also the same, sometimes it gets difficult especially when some people give you good ratings/hikes just based on the amount of you being socialised, if you think it is more imp then work on it else leave it and try to make bond organically rather than pushing yourself.
For the first question: You notice the team members and for sure out of which one person is a easy taking person., take that person for a casual office coffee table chat and get to know the people from that person and slowly ask him/her to include yourself in the team lunch and other stuffs and eventually you will build a good rapport with the team
If you want to become so close to some particular person like you did in your previous company you this would really help and based on individual characters you can expand or maintain the level of easiness and friendship
Coming to second point:
First things first I can see you work in IBM., you know it very well it is a giant orga., and obviously before being involved in the real time project you have to go through trainings and make sure you understand the structure of your team and if you are a software developer you have to understand the repository folder structure so many things and architecture is very important.
Going forward you can do two things:
- You intimate your manager you have finished the assigned trainings and lean loaded
- Ask for a mentor from your manager., in case you already have ask the mentor for sample tasks based on your past experience and trainings If no mentor ask manager directly for a smaller and not so time critical tasks and finish those things with utmost quality and show your progress this will lead to a good impression and you will be assigned works so soon All the best
