Why is self-understanding so hard?

I'm not sure why we find it so difficult to understand ourselves.

What we aspire to be yet are unable to pursue our dream or passion.

My childhood hope was that before the age of 25, I would be able to hold everything, such as a house and a car.

But I have accomplished nothing until now. All of my dreams, which consist of nothing more than seeing myself succeed in the future, demotivate me greatly, causing me to feel miserable. Every day, my failure serves as a reminder that I am useless.

I work hard every day, yet I sometimes feel like I'm not doing what I should be doing.

Guys, I need your opinions about that is it phobia or fear of something else.