Something Random on the topic of love
So I completed 27 years a few weeks back. And I think I know somewhat about loving someone and falling in love.
And all that I can say is that beyond a certain limit (which is less) :
- physical beauty does not matter
- humour does not matter
- neither does money matter.
This is all important but yet temporary.
What matters more is whether the two involved :
- Have the similar values and belief system (not in a religious way but in every way apart from that).
- Are the two willing to never give up on each other.
- Are the two both willing to give each other all that is needed to keep each other truly genuinely happy and not just the bare minimum.
- Are the two completely honest with each other and in sync with how they themselves and the other half always is.
It’s never been about things being perfect. They never will be, you are bound to have struggles and honestly even when you tick one checkbox, 2 new goals are already there to run for and struggle with.
So you are never going to have that perfect with someone in general, all you can have is a partner who will always be willing to fight all your battles with you, either be a part of them your be your strongest cheerleader in it.
It’s all about being true to someone and putting in a genuine effort, consistently whenever possible.
Its as if I have written this! I agree on this 100% Trust, empathy, honesty and commitment to make it work from both sides is the basis of any healthy strong relationship
I'm 27M, and i have a lot of times come across shallow people. They cant do deep conversations, they have stupid expectations and moreover, they cannot be honest about how they truly feel. You can definitely make acquaintances work with them, but you cannot make a relationship work with them as at the very least, you'll always be second guessing yourself on why they cannot be their true self with you, even though you have been open, honest, non judgemental and keep their privacy.
True
The thing with check boxes of beauty/humour/money is that one should be judged on how they got it and how they use it These check boxes are there for a reason, they do provide heuristics into a person's belief and values Say for if someone is beautiful-: it mostly comes due to a belief of maintaining good health which is very important to go through life together in the long term If someone has great humour-: it mostly tells about them that they're very well equipped to pick you up and take you through the rough times of life, ensuring to always put a smile on your face. Remember that a lot of pain can be dampened by just laughing it off. If someone earned money by themselves (self made)-: it shows they have been disciplined through a significant period of their life and shows how they value wealth creation and Discipline is the single most variable which is directly proportional to the longevity and quality of our lives. in summary, yes the 'never giving up' characteristic is important but it's such an abstract value that it can rarely be measured/known before marriage for any person and Hence we use other quantitative heuristics like beauty/money/humour to make our best estimates of the abstract qualities of a person
Fair. All I meant to say that these are all the first glance things that will be tempting and though they still say a lot about you…..but it’s less about this ultimately and more about the other things I listed below.
If everything is fine. You would be alright with someone who is less beautiful in the societal or general terms, someone who is less humourous and has less money, but can’t be alright with someone who doesn’t genuinely cares for you .
But the tough part is finding someone like that. You'll most likely not find a person with such compatibility on matrimonial websites. What is the solution then?
I don’t know the solution, it’s a problem I will face too soon. Anyone has any answers to this (not expecting really 😂ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚ðŸ˜)
