Question for women, both married and single
What are the chances, and how many of you are married to a guy who earns less than or equal to what you make? I’m not talking about assets or net worth—just straight-up earnings.
The reason I’m asking is this: My parents are looking for matches for my brother. He’s born, brought up, and living in Andhra Pradesh, works a fully remote job, and makes around 95k per month. He’s got a bike and a few properties in his name. So far, we’ve come across two unemployed girls (same caste, of course), and they’re demanding a groom who earns more than 2 lakhs per month, plus owns assets like farmland, a house, etc.
I’ve seen those Instagram posts and memes about women wanting men who earn 2 lakhs or more, and I always thought it was just some brainrot nonsense. But now I’m wondering—are most women really like that? Like, women in STEM field, do they not realize how hard it is to build skills and land a decent job these days?
What’s your take on this?
Believe me this is not a rage bait post, i assure you bcoz I'll be marrying in an year or two.
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You have to understand that arranged marriage is not about finding love. Arrange marriage is about finding the best deal. so in order to find the best deal, you have to negotiate.
If you are looking for a life partner, you have to get the know the person for atleast a few months before both of you commit.

All this empowerment and feminism crap has made modern women delusional. They seem to have a inflated sense of worth now.
As a man you should not settle for less. If you are making 1 Lakh/2 lakh every month you are better off single then marrying an unemployed gold digger who doesn't care about you or your family and is there just for the money.
@Sam_altman I second you.
- Simps, our ancestors who killed female infants, and parents who taught their daughters what to expect but not what they should contribute to a relationship, Also not to mention the diverse hirings has brought hell kinda situations upon good men who doesn't talk back and say anything in a different way.
True bro
Without judgement , this trend is extremely popular in south India . I have lived in Tamil Nadu for 6+yrs and Bangalore for the last 10 yrs almost and I have seen girls demanding a flat , a US travel possibility , farmland , even salary slips in advance . In east or north east in particular, we don’t see this trend . Not even having big assets . Guys with long term job security obviously gets a higher acceptance for obvious reasons . And there are plenty of friends of mine whose wife earns equal or more than the guys and it’s absolutely normal . It’s sad that girls demand so much from the guys and discourages anyone who doesn’t have big assets or US visa
East, NE, and even some parts of top-North, are exceptions. But this is pretty common even in central and North India.
I earn more than my husband, I know many who do . Mine was a love marriage though and the only reason we have income disparity is because my domain pays more in general . At the end of the day it’s about making a life comfortable and being happy. If your husband can take care of his expenses (parents, luxuries) then two of you combined can work on building a good and comfortable life
Luxuries- the luxuries he wants to spend on, not your demands . Just to clarify 😅
I find it hard to believe but if it's true then you're what is called an exception. It's pretty rare in nature.
I heard the same from my family and friends. Literally a few of them are not able to marry because of this. The world is so fast paced now a days and running against money, I can understand why Girls and the parents would want to have that security whn getting their daughter married to someone they haven't met till date. Its a financial risk situation they wanted to avoid and it's no one's fault. The moment you marry and have a daughter, I am sure your thoughts would be the same.
Girls needing guys with more packages doesn't mean they are greedy and love money. Its just the community around them that's making them do that.
Imagine, a family bearing a girl child in the community gets her married to a guy with say 1 lakh salary or so. Let's forget about assets for now. The community around her parents would ask tons of very bothering questions and it's hard to take.
So its easy life for both the girl and parents to get a guy with good salary instead.
And if you ask, is life better with good salary? Probably yes or Probably no. If both of them have good attitude and love to settle down and compromise on life situations their life is absolute bliss even with little money. Even if they earn millions and they dont understand each other or have sadistic thoughts/attitude, their life is going to be hell.
By end of the day its KARMA that will drive the life.
So don't over think. Your brother will get someone who is willing about his financial situation and family background.
I am a guy by the way. So this reply is unbiased.
They say —— Girls should always marry upwards in social / economic hierarchy. That’s the sociological engrained criteria of Indian families. That’s why - A girl earning 6 LPA wants a boy earning 24 LPA. Not just the girl but all the people in her family want it to be a step up. Bigger house, car, better standard of living.
Don't agree with this 2 Lakh+ earning mentality but I for one think that in arrange marriage atleast, the groom should be earning more. Read further instead of judging right away. After 2-3 years of marriage, the couple would get pressure from both families to have kids. Right after you start family planning, the female would have to keep her career aside for a little while. So first of all, do financial planning prior to family planning. Second, if the partner is not earning enough at the time, and the couple still starts having a family, it would be a tedious situation for them to handle. Considering this, I would say the groom should earn enough to sustain a good life for two people at the time of marriage so that till they reach the point to start a family, he would be able to handle financial situations alone for a while.
Read it. Still garbage.
Everywhere in India, girls are slowly breaking the past norms but don't want to leave the luxury of patriarchal society.
It's an unsaid norm in arrange marriage, a girl would prefer someone earning 2x, 3x, 10x, 20x. It's demand and supply pure economics. Even in love marriage a girls would mostly select a better looking and more secure guy than her. Exceptions are there and I deeply respect women. Gender ratio is skewed, there are more males than females. It's economics.
Chronology tho samaj gaya, but I just hope there are still some kind-hearted, well-raised women with strong moral values out there who believe in building and growing together, and probably we find them by any means.
A guy here. I find such posts silly, and yet these keep getting posted time and again. I mean this is a no-brainer question.
Arranged marriage is just like a business deal, there are no emotions and love involved until after finalization of marriage. So obviously if it is all about getting yourself the best match keeping in mind all aspects (boy’s earning, looks, family wealth etc.), and it goes both ways, boys too look for the same, but then the crucial number game comes into picture- number of working girls Vs number of working guys- huge difference, so obviously girls get to pick and choose amongst much larger pool, hence that disproportionate earning angle comes in.
So it is all obvious, I don’t understand why it is so difficult to understand. If you have a problem with that, prefer love marriage route by getting into romance and love game early on when you are young.
P.S.- A key assumption here- A Job doing guy, is looking for a job doing girl match. If the guy is okay with unemployed girl, in most cases such situations will not arise.