Poorly explain what you do for a living

Press buttons in front of a medium screen, just so I can relax in front of a large screen while looking at a small screen.

I give money to people so they can give it to WeWork and AWS

I ask people if I'm audible and if they can see my screen

I am a yes man. I say yes to all the garbage ideas that my manager dumps on me in the name of growth projects. In the spare time I keep counting the 'exit' corpus that I am building to escape this life and start something on my own.

I find faults in everything my colleagues do 🫢

I gamble on ideas and people

I help people part with their money 🤣

I try to guess what doesn’t work, why it stopped working, curse manager, curse the company, why did I choose this field, hate myself for doing it, question every life choice ever made since I could talk, blame parents for my life choices.

In the end….. when it starts working again, I am happy again😁 and go out to drink to celebrate🍾. Then comes Monday again and repeat it all again😞

I’ll go first I turn numbers into anxiety (aka data analyst)

I offer people cookies