Feeling Lost AF

I keep getting scouted out by recruiters and get referrals to good companies…I apply with referrals and as per what recruiters want…

But after that….it’s all silent. No responses, no proceedings, nothing.

Heard back from one place I was referred to and they rejected my application.

I’m feeling quite lost. Not sure what to do.

I hate my job and the pressure and some of the coworkers are getting on my nerves - they just find ways to pull down my leg because I’m not exactly cool with bigoted jokes, or with making fun of people’s insecurities. Or they come to me for queries - like it’s barely been any year???? Pls bro I’m just as lost as you, leave me alone dawg 😭

I want to switch but there’s practically no prospects at the moment, and no hopes of hearing back(even for rejections) unless you network and apply with referrals.

I’m so swamped with work, I can barely sleep and cannot study or do anything for recreation. My salary is peanuts cuz of inflation + savings, and I don’t know what to do next?

Probation is for 18 months and I have to wait at least another 2-3 months before I get any raise….and I feel as a support engineer, I did get to learn technical stuff but there’s no scope for dev, and I don’t want to be in technical support forever - despite how much the upper mgmt “encourages” about how it could be a good field to progress in further. I cannot handle on-call shifts, or rotational shifts or sacrificing my weekends every month - for no extra pay or compensation…

Should I switch? Master’s? MBA? Upskill??

How do I make time to study when WFO days literally waste my entire day - cannot do anything in the morning cuz of commute and when I reach home, it’s almost midnight and I have no strength to even eat dinner wtf…it’s so tiring to deal with every week…

Everyday is such a pain to deal with. I wanna quit but then my extended-family is too trigger happy and would speed run my arrange marriage + it’s better to have some money than no money at all, I think😔

Sometimes I feel like I wanna switch my brain off and not do anything at all - or ask someone else to make the decisions for me…could be easier to manage my life that way, I feel at times…

Am I going to feel this way forever???

(Just wanted to rant, but feel free to advice me if you’re up for it, kind strangers)