Bizarre questions in Arranged Marriage
Hey Currently I am going through arranged marriage process, I am having around 6 YOE earning 24 LPA in a US fintech MNC. My parents and society are forcing me to meet prospects. Wherever I go the only talk I get that what is my job security.
When I tried to look for matches I have got bizarre questions, I don't want to marry just anyone who treats this like a business deal.
All over that one girl's father asked me to show my offer letter and asked if my org will do layoffs. nowadays people find tech jobs risky, I don't know what is the right parameter for them I am a male with a normal stable career. Another prospect asked if I will get US visa next year so she can move out of India.
In the start of my carrier I have paid my education loan and not able to save much like others did, like I don't have a car , flat just have a bike that too I have bought last year. I have a cash of 25 lakh as saving and emergency fund. But one family literally asked if I can buy a 3 BHK in Bangalore before the wedding date.
Also as you know, as we are growing we are facing so much pressure. I don't have anyone to share all these. I was planning to just focus on my work but because of these thoughts I am getting a bit distracted and Not able to sleep.
Do you guys feel same ?
Every single question they asked is valid. The best part, you can ask too. Ask about her father's wealth. Ask her mother weight. Ask her what does she bring to the table. Ask her father if he can get you a car before marriage. check the gold and silver they are willing to give. ask where they plan to live after the marriage...
There is no point in cribbing. Marriage market has been like this always.
A cow cannot complain that the hyenas' cannot attack her because a cow doesnt attack the hyena.
Arranged Marriage market is like this only. You must have a flat if you want to get married, or else exceedingly high package (like 50-60 LPA at your exp). So your best chance is, buy an apartment on loan and start flaunting it😀
Yeah it really feels like that. I don't want to take a massive loan just to impress someone for marriage though.
I had a car, a spacious 3 BHK in Bengaluru and I got "ohh you got a flat ah... Not a plot aa..." from a girl's mother, just a year and half ago.
Another girl I met gave demands, like she needs to buy jewellery every three months, a domestic vacation every half year and an international vacation once a year, that too on the very first date. I just stood up and left without even uttering a word.
But don't worry, you'll find the right one. Saying this as a happily married guy now.
Expectations nowadays exceed the norm. It's gone beyond stratosphere limits.
Exactly. It feels more like a business deal than finding a life partner. It is just sad to see.
Been there, faced that. Ignore such prospects at all cost. The ones who start the relationship with finance as foundation are most likely the ones who also end it because of finance. Think of it like dodging a possible alimony.
Those that ask red flag questions are to be thanked for easy rejection
Marriage market is always like that . My sincere advise for you is please go for a good girl who can make you believe in yourself so avoid putting filters like Caste Colour Working etc . Simple girl whose presence can make you feel cool and safe
