Arranged marriage - Feeling very low. And how hard does it become to get married post turning 30(M)?
I am 29M, turning 30 this July. I am working in Bangalore at a FAANG company as a Software Engg. Recently went to my hometown in Rajasthan for meeting families for arranged marriage.
- Girl 1 (28F) - my first priority . I spent so much of my time, emotions, energy on her. She used to reciprocate before the family meeting, when we both were in Bangalore (She works at FAANG too). The family meeting felt very positive to me. But she has been acting cold lately. Taking multiple hours and now more than a day or two just to reply back. All the emotions and energy gave me nothing back.
- Girl 2 (26F) - another FAANG girl. my second priority. The family meeting felt very positive to me. But got a message from her two days ago that they won't be moving forward. I think their main issue might be that my parents are staying with me till marriage. Her Chacha told her father that my parents won't be earning now, etc etc. WTH!
- Girl 3 (26F) - Software Engineer. Didn't meet due to some family functions and then her Bua got hospitalized in ICU.
- Girl 4 (25F) - Private school teacher for 10th and 12th sections. Met the family but they seemed to be very money minded. Asked about my exact monthly salary, properties etc.
A common concern I felt might be, was small home in my Tier 4 city hometown and also my parents living with me for some months. I can afford a flat in Bangalore but I don't want to invest so much right now. I had 4 options before, but not suddenly dropped to 0 or 0.5 at max. All the time, money, energy got wasted. I am feeling very low right now. Does age matter? If yes, how much? Since I will be turning 30 soon. My main fear is that I might lose a lot of good options post 30. And how should I look for matches going forward? Since it will be difficult for me and family to go near hometown again and again just to meet 1 or 2 families.
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I am 32 and I am out of marriage market, accepted a lonely life ahead and somewhat it feels liberating. Pressure is gone, it's difficult to get someone to like you now a days, just take a lot of efforts, I will probably save 90% of my salary and retire at 40-45 and start travelling the world.
If school teacher keeps false case drag u court. Everything gone.
1 - leave, 3 - contact again if no move on
4 - leave.
If school teacher or tier-3 doesn't meant they nice.
Bhai tum to single maaroge merko
Honestly to me it sounds like an issue with your family. There is something about them which irks those women. And you are from Rajasthan, are there any regressive practices at your home?? Ghunghat? Or issues with western outfits?
Ghunghat 🤣🤣. Na bhai. I am a Punjabi living in Rajasthan. No restrictions at all.
I advice you to go with Number 4
Why do you want to marry...
Except #3, you should leave the other options and try to find some new options. Trust me, arrange marriage is not easy. Dont lose hope, but at the same keep introspecting whether you are having any unreasonable filters for matches.